


In These Uncertain Times

by Viridian5



Category: Weiß Kreuz
Genre: American Politics, Assassins & Hitmen, COVID-19, Gen, Post-Canon, Telepathy, Trolling, YouTube culture, shelter in place
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-14
Updated: 2020-07-14
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:02:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25701793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Viridian5/pseuds/Viridian5
Summary: Schuldig passing the time/trolling in a YouTube video while trapped in the US during the pandemic [all monologue, not an actual video here]. Warnings for COVID-19, American political content, and Schuldig.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 15





	In These Uncertain Times

**Author's Note:**

> I guess this is what watching reaction videos and [_UNHhhh_](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLhgFEi9aNUb2BNrIEecCGXApgeX7Yjwz8) on YouTube gets me. Thanks to Akira 17 for the beta.

_This YouTube video was posted 7/14/20 with the title “Answering Your Comments and Suggestions!” and a video description of “Du hasst/hast mich.” It features a handsome man with light blue eyes and his ginger hair tied back who might be in his thirties, with a bare white wall behind him. He says_ :

“I’m just letting you know I’m not going to put bleeping or quacking sounds over the curse words because I figure this one’s gonna get demonetized anyway, like a lot of my other non-reaction videos.

“I know that reaction videos are quick, easy, lazy, a money grab, and a cynical way to entice more people into watching your channel but in today’s economic climate I have to get whatever cash I can wherever I can. My usual work is an in-person thing, and some people may consider it non-essential. Suggest things you want me to react to in the comments. I may not be a millennial or zoomer supposedly seeing and hearing everything for the first time, but I’ve forgotten a lot and seeing and hearing me reexperiencing something might be interesting to some of you who cringe seeing things completely going over some reactors’ baby-faced heads. I’m not an American but thanks to a longtime coworker I’ve picked up a _lot_.

“For those of you confused that my English could pass for an American’s, including my accent, I’ve spent _way_ too much time in a small apartment with that coworker for the last few months and it rubbed off on me.

“I’m cheesed off that my reaction to [Rammstein’s ‘Du Hast’ live in Paris video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U5HAEzEk8QM) probably wouldn’t be of much interest to viewers since I’m already really familiar with their music and was even in the fire zone at a few of their live shows. To cover the question most first-time reactors have to that video, _yes_ , the keyboardist is on a treadmill and that’s one of the least weirdest things you’ll see Flake doing during a performance. It always gives me such a smile watching a French audience chant in German on command....” _Hums a bit of “Feuer Frei!”_

“For those of you who _aren’t_ here to watch me react to a ‘Weird Al’ Yankovic song and/or video or whatever, here comes the red meat you love to make my comment section into a radioactive dumpster fire over. To which I say, come at me, bro.

“I know Trump said Mexico was gonna pay for a border wall but I never guessed he’d have 130,000+ Americans die to make something like that happen. I mean, I don’t care about most people’s lives either, but I never asked anyone to make me the head of their country’s government. It’s hilarious watching him trying to spin a total failure in leadership as more ‘winning’. Becoming the global epicenter of COVID-19 through sheer incompetence, delusion, and narcissism is part of him ‘making America great again’? ‘We’re number one! We’re number one!’ Now he’s saying Americans should just live with the virus and deaths since he has no intention of truly fighting any of it. Reading his mind must be a _trip_. Probably a short trip though.

“Then again, you guys elected him and he has a 40% approval rating even as he’s fiddling while his country burns and lining his pockets. You do nothing as he openly, publicly does illegal, immoral, corrupt, and unconstitutional things with the power you’ve given him. The rest of the world is laughing nervously at Americans these days. And making plans without you since you’re useless to yourselves and others lately.

“At least I’m living in a US state where people aren’t such delicate snowflakes that they can’t bear to wear a face mask in public, though April and May here were... a _lot_ , too much... really rough sometimes. For all you ‘’Murica: love it or leave it’ folks in the audience, I would _love_ to leave, but the US has failed so publicly and massively in fighting the virus that most countries won’t let anyone from the US inside anymore. I mean, you guys won’t wear masks to protect your own neighbors, so there’s no expectation that you’d choose to act like decent human beings in a foreign country. Though ICE has no qualms about telling college students that if the school they’re studying at isn’t offering on-site instruction because of the pandemic that they have to leave the US. To go where, if their home country won’t take them? Wherever, just not here. I’m sure ICE will throw them _somewhere_ ; it’s not like they care about human lives.

“Me saying this has some ironies....

“I may be putting an actual target on my back here, but I’ve never been good at shutting up.

“Why am I in this country? It’ll be a short job for good money, he said. It’ll be in and out, he said. Four months later.... His foresight is usually pretty good, but this time when it failed it really shit the bed. Good going, _Brad_.

“Damn it, I need a haircut; I’m tired of pulling it all back into a ponytail. Yes, I’m looking at myself in the camera.

“So, like, dislike, subscribe, hit the notification button, leave a comment, even if it’s to tell me to go to hell since I feed on your anger, something about the algorithm, catchphrase.” 

### End

NOTES: I imagine that a telepath would have a lot of difficulty living in New York City from March through July 2020.

Schuldig did get some killings in during this time, by showing up at victims’ doors as a food delivery app person. Don’t mind him, he’s just delivering piping hot murder.


End file.
